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Hold on ... hold on ... keep your mouth shut.

Now, we've got some questions we'd like you to answer for us. These are definitely outside your area of expertise, but given enough time, you'll get the answers without prompting. So straighten your glasses, quiz kid, and try to look like someone who knows what they're talking about.

The movie Sahara stars Matthew McConaughey, whose nephew was christened what?
a) Mickey Mouse McConaughey
b) Mobile Home McConaughey
c) Miller Lyte McConaughey

Dan Brown uses what technique to overcome writer's block?
a) Spelunking
b) Hanging upside down
c) Making origami fish

Blue Jeans produced by Levi Strauss during WWII aided the war effort by doing which of these?
a) Omitting copper rivets from the jeans
b) Donating more than 1 million pairs of trousers to servicemen
c) Painting on decorative stitching, rather than waste thread

In the 1980's, actress/singer Pia Zadora was nominated for all of these awards, but did not receive which one?
a) Golden Globe Award for Best New Star of the Year
b) Grammy Award for Best Female Rock Vocal Performance
c) Golden Raspberry Award for Worst New Star of the Decade

Which creation of mail-order magnate Harold von Braunhut was taken into space by John Glenn?
a) Amazing Sea-Monkeys
b) Invisible Goldfish
c) X-Ray Spex

In her 1922 guide to gracious behavior, Etiquette in Society, in Business, in Politics and at Home, Emily Post does not employ which character as an exemplar of proper etiquette?
a) Mrs. John Hunter Titherington Smith
b) Mrs. George Worthington Grandname
c) Mrs. Alice Toplofty Gilding

While First Lady of the United States, Betty Ford was known by what Secret Service code name?
a) Pinafore
b) Piña Colada
c) Pinwheel

While many characters have been immortalized in plastic as PEZ dispensers, which has been honored with the most different portraits?
a) Garfield
b) Santa Claus
c) Charlie Brown

As recounted in Hemingway and Bailey's Bartending Guide to Great American Writers, Ernest Hemingway won a $50 wager from John O'Hara by breaking a heavy wooden what over his own head?
a) Barstool
b) Shillelagh
c) Oar

In carny slang, a "floss wagon" refers to what?
a) A cotton candy stand
b) An elaborately decorated carousel
c) A game offering only worthless prizes