A Block Party

Halloween always hits me like a brick! Every year I'm visited by a series of small costumed figures.

It's getting dark and the street lights just turned on. The stream of trick-or-treaters is on the way and the first group is pretty large. The guy in the front has a full-on ape suit and is carrying a banana. Then there's a couple of kids walking together, clearly coming from the same place. One has a dark red suit with flowers, with some armor and a helmet and the other kid is pretty chubby and isn't wearing much except a strange loin piece. It's entirely too cold for that! Next, a kid in overalls, with a big bushy beard and a woolen cap, carrying a fishing rod and a fish. The next kid has a bat and a cap and a Clutchers uniform. Finally, a costume that I'm used to seeing. Some people use gauze or white cloths, but I swear this kid just used toilet paper!

The next group has four kids. The first one is kind of fancy. He has a big hat with a feather and a blue top with a fleur-de-lis on it. The next guy is dressed in furs; he has a silver helmet with two horns and is carrying a battle axe! This next kid is clearly creative with his DIY costume. He's covered his clothes with splotches of paint and is carrying a palette and a paintbrush. And the last kid in a white uniform with a dark blue scarf and an anchor on his cap… Is that a telescope in his hand?

With the last group gone, I see a new trio approaching. The first one is dressed in a cap and gown - probably reusing his older sibling's set. I just hope the diploma he is carrying isn't real. The other two clearly tried to outdo each other. One has a gold Roman helmet with sword and shield, and the other has a bright red outfit and a very tall hat.

Things were quiet for a bit, but then a relatively large group showed up. As I opened my door, the first one started giving a long speech thanking her parents and my neighbors and... the producers? I thought that was very strange, but it was nothing compared to the next two! The next guy was very polite until he turned to look the other direction and he started acting like a monster with green makeup and everything! And speaking of monsters - the next costume was a very convincing one-eyed giant! After that frightening ordeal, the next person in line served me a very fancy bottle of seltzer water, then asked me to place some candy on his silver tray. There was a fifth person in line too, but he was too chicken to approach my door.

After that, one single person showed up at my front door. The way he was dressed, it looked like he had taken a wrong turn on the Appalachian Trail. I asked if he was lost, but he showed me his map and compass and assured me that he was where he meant to be and demanded some candy.

The next group that arrived at my porch was just two guys, but they were the scariest group by far! Look, I know there's not any reason why the first one should have scared me as much as he did, but I've read It and he just made me uncomfortable all the way up until the point where he made a balloon dog right in front of me. But the other guy was dressed as my biggest fear! I like Peter Parker just fine, but this guy was a whole different type of spider man!

It's getting late, but there's still one last group on their way down the sidewalk. Halloween costumes don't have to be rocket science, but the first girl in line wanted it to be anyway. The next guy is straight out of the '80s with those pink pants - I just hope he doesn't try to play that instrument he's carrying. Next up are two girls who are peas in a pod in their head-to-toe costumes - one of them literally so. The next girl clearly didn't put too much effort in - I think she's trick-or-treating in her actual pajamas. The last two guys in the group clearly planned together since they're both carrying shields - I like the one with the raven on it the best.