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The Mock Turtle

[Post-Hunt erratum: The version of this meta that appeared during Hunt had an error in the eighth clue. The corrected clue is below. We're very sorry.]

Here you see a turtle-like animal who appears to be made of bits and pieces of other beings. He looks at you sorrowfully.

"I used to be sad about not being a real turtle," he says, "but right now I have even more problems. The others are always having their tea parties, but I haven't been able to join them since the Beast came. You see, with all the craziness around here recently, and all of these outsiders" --he looks at you, but more in sadness than anything else-- "coming by, it's been very crowded, and there's just not enough room for everyone to fit anymore. I try to pretend they're with me by using mock versions of them, but it's not the same. If only there were a way to allow more people to fit comfortably around the table at tea time, then I could be with my friends again..."

Nothing but a Pack of Cards
Common Bonds
Cut and Tape
Assemble Me
Safer Sephiroth
Falling into Place
Round Tripper
Initial Impressions
Introduction to Collegiate Notetaking
Please Remain Seated
Stronghold Fire
Only Carmen Sandiego Explores Nigh Unstoppably

creator and family (26,13)
's airplane (in reality) (15,1)
's "very small" character (5,2)
Beverage endorsed by (14,9)
Container for product (10,25)
First word of 's children's TV show name (6,3)
Focus of meme (17,8)
How "these " were preserv'd (7,22)
Lancaster and , for example (4,21)
Primary developer of the library (20,24)
Send email to experts on the (23,16)
Usin' a , perhaps? (12,11)
What does, before being shot (18,19)