Solution to Fascinating Kids

by Andrew Thomas, Kate Baker, Cindy Keeler, Oliver Kosut, David Poland, Bryan Ruddy, and Tracy Yonemoto

Each of the paragraphs is a biographical sketch of a fictional kid. The characters are also each in a disctinct grade of school. In the order presented, they are:

Bart Simpson	(The Simpsons)				grade  4
Binky Barnes	(Arthur)				grade  3
Calvin		(Calvin and Hobbes)			grade  1
Cameron Frye	(Ferris Bueller's Day Off)		grade 12
Janice Avery	(Bridge to Terabithia)			grade  7
Janie Loomis	(Are You There, God? It's Me, Margaret)	grade  6
Jeff Fishkin	(There's a Boy in the Girls' Bathroom)	grade  5
Lawrence Talbot	(I Was a Second Grade Werewolf)		grade  2
Leah		(Juno)					grade 11
Sabrina Davis	(Dazed and Confused)			grade  9
Tai Frasier	(Clueless)				grade 10

Solvers should notice that these paragraphs have very different, somewhat constrained writing styles. Noting the distinct grade levels of the characters, and the portrayal of these paragraphs as school essays, one might try calculating the Flesch-Kincaid grade level of each passage. (The title also mildly clues this, with the F-K initial letters.) Each passage has a near-integer grade level:

Bart Simpson		Grade Level 5.003   (5)
Binky Barnes		Grade Level 6.003   (6)
Calvin			Grade Level 8.9978  (9)
Cameron Frye		Grade Level 11.0032 (11)
Janice Avery		Grade Level -.0005  (0)
Janie Loomis		Grade Level 3.98098 (4)
Jeff Fishkin		Grade Level 1.99801 (2)
Lawrence Talbot		Grade Level 1.00778 (1)
Leah			Grade Level 6.9966  (7)
Sabrina Davis		Grade Level 10.002  (10)
Tai Frasier		Grade Level 12.004  (12)

(Note that the numbers vary slightly depending on the calculation tool used; these numbers came from applying the formula by hand.)

These Flesch-Kincaid grade levels correspond to the actual grade levels of other characters. Forming a chain starting with grade level zero, a clue phrase can be read down the diagonal of the ordered names:
Janiceavery		 7 written in  0
lEah			11 written in  7
caMeronfrye		12 written in 11
taiFraiser		10 written in 12
sabrInadavis		 9 written in 10
calviN			 1 written in  9
lawrenCetalbot		 2 written in  1
jefffisHkin		 5 written in  2
bartsimpSon		 4 written in  5
janieloomIs		 6 written in  4
binkybarneS 		 3 written in  6

Jem Finch is a character in "To Kill a Mockingbird", whose sister is named SCOUT.