Why is it so hard for you to grasp the concept that self-esteem is not just the same thing as conceit?

I may be "just a housewife", missy, but at least I'm not a little hussy like you who goes out every night dressed like a tramp and comes back at 1 in the morning.

Look, I know that Gödel proved that some facts can be unprovable but true anyway, but I think it's improbable that your assertion is one of those.

Every movie review you write gets basic facts about the movie's plot wrong; you really should see the movie a second time so you can revise what you've written.

The first victim of the curse of the pyramid was the photographer, and after the burial chamber collapsed on him, we had an awful time trying to recover his camera from the rubble.

Why, what I say is that they ought to lock him up in the hoosegow for life—well, that is, if he's judged guilty, of course.

Barbra Streisand's directorial debut, Yentl, is a feel-good musical that can be enjoyed by Jew and Gentile alike.

If any well-meaning person ever tries to tell you you're a unique individual, tell them that you're exactly the same as everybody else.

Rufus had to try to stop Bill and Ted from going back to medieval Greenland and kidnapping Eric the Red.

I happen to know that you're in so much debt that if you don't return your books when they're due, you won't even be able to handle the library fine.

Did you know that Hawaiian Punch is made with five real fruit flavors?

My little brother was incredibly hyper yesterday; he kept climbing all over the furniture and I couldn't calm him down till Mom and Dad came home.

Look, Steve, this wheelbarrow is about an inch and a half away from collapsing under the weight that's on it already; I really don't think it'd be a good idea to add even another ounce of sand to it.

Before Italy switched to using the euro, the lira was so small that just a liter of water would cost a couple thousand of them.

Casey and Andy haven't been able to get the King of Sweden off their sofa for years.

The defendant was wearing a gray pleated skirt, a pair of tennis shoes, and a shirt with a slogan on it that was totally inappropriate for a court proceeding.

Well, if he really owed you that much money, then I would say he ought to pay you back.

Symptoms of Bell's palsy include paralysis of one side of the face, pain around the ear, and loss of the sense of taste.

You expect me to believe that the only reason you were growing those hemp plants was so that you could use them to make rope and canvas?

One employee of the store was arrested right away, but further investigation appeared to implicate two more in the burglary.

You can take your argument and stick it right up your rectum, as far as I'm concerned.