Scriptor Ecclesiae

Stephanie Dalquist, Sam Kendig, Alejandro Sedeno


  1. Figure out that the puzzle is about popes
  2. Figure out who the popes are
  3. Use hints in intro text to organize them by how long they were in office
  4. Get phone number, dial, get enraged Brit
  5. Pick out key parts of enraged Brit, and discover who the HELL James thinks he is.
  6. Profit!! I mean, Answer!!


The little boy is Benedetto Odescalchi (1611-1689), also known as Blessed Innocent XI, elected to the papacy on 21 September 1676, after initially being rejected as a candidate for the position by pressure of the French government. This isn't spectacularly important to the puzzle, but it's in the attempt to be consistent.

Solutions, in order of number:
Boniface VI 16 days April 897 put to death by successor? twice charged with deprivation of orders
Agapetus I 1 yr 535-536 First, burnt anathema Ordered new immorality trial for thieving bishop
Innocent VII 2 yrs 1404-1406 indebted to the king of Naples fled Viterbo after murders of nephew
Nicholas IV 4 yrs 3 mos 1288-1292 elected after delay of febbre e timore first of his order
Boniface V 5 yrs 11 mos 619-625 concerned for the future of the Church in England forbade acolytes from translating the relics of martyrs
Paul II 6 yrs 11 mos 1464-1471 The direction di Venezia Businessman and nephew of a pope
Nicholas V 8 yrs + a few weeks 1447-1455 arte e letteratura periodi della peste - ha fuggito Roma
John III 13 years 561-574 fought the Lombard with l'eunuco del guerriero finished Philip and James
Clement VIII 14 years 1592-1605 trattato fra la Francia e la Savoia forbade Christians to read il Talmud
Martin V 16 years 1417-1431 Foundations of la rinascita di Roma - hiring Tuscans to rebuild Roma Confirmed decrees of council on reform

Arrange to get:
617 452 5385

Calling that number reveals an answering machine message that gives the answer.


Fixed in 2010 by the archivists of Beginner's Luck. Rows 4-6 in the table had swapped dates and length of service.